This post may contain affiliate links, which means I’ll receive a commission if you purchase through my links at no extra cost to you. Please read my full disclosure for more information.

I admit: my mom was my motivation in writing this article. (Hi, Mom!)

She’s been pretty stressed over the last couple years, what with the virus, family stuff, politics, and so on. (I’m sure most of you can relate.)

I’ve suggested mindfulness to her and she said she didn’t really know where to start and that she felt like she needed a simple, beginner’s guide to mindfulness. This is that guide. I hope it will help her — and you! — find your way to a less-stressful and happier life. 

I was fortunate enough to have a teacher and guide when I started my mindfulness journey. He had decades of experience in mindful practice and had studied overseas with experts in the subject. As a clinical psychologist, he was also a strong proponent of the health benefits of mindful meditation. I was skeptical at first but he won me over, and I’m very glad he did.

Because I learned from him, a lot of the advice I’m going to share with you is based on what he told me — tips, tricks, books, and so on. 

Beginner’s Guide to Mindfulness: What is Mindfulness, Anyway?

Mindfulness is living in the moment instead of focusing on the past or the future. It’s accepting what is, right now, and not dwelling on what you think things should be or what you wish they were. 

So, what does that actually mean?

It means that, instead of thinking about the fight you had with so-and-so last week or all the things you need to do today, you focus whole-heartedly on what you’re doing right now.

No multitasking, no worrying, no judgement. Focus on your body and what it’s doing, the sights, sounds, and smells around you, and how you feel. 

Being present in the moment can also include celebrating the season you’re in — taking time to notice the aspects of, say, winter that bring you joy and indulging in them, rather than spending all of winter wishing it was spring. This is one of my favorite ways to practice mindfulness.

 

Why Should You Care?

There are plenty of studies that show mindfulness can help reduce stress and anxiety, and since those are two things found everywhere in today’s society, it can help basically everyone. Everyone from Mayo Clinic to the VA recommend it!

Personally, I find it helpful because it puts everything in perspective. If (or when) I’m getting mad about something silly, mindfulness helps me take a breath, step back, and evaluate my reaction and whether it’s useful to me. 

For example…

Say I’m annoyed that my roommate’s puppy has run off with a hand towel that she grabbed off the counter. Instead of getting mad at her and reacting with anger, which would only make her more hyper, I pause, take a breath, and think. She’s just a puppy; she doesn’t understand that towels aren’t for her. It’s not her fault. So there’s no use in getting mad at her for being what she is.

With that pause, I can then calmly get her to drop the towel — which she’ll do more readily, since I’m not coming from a place of high energy that she thinks means playtime — and note to myself that she’s grown enough that we need to move the towels back even further from the edge!

In another example, maybe I’m out and about somewhere and someone’s being really rude to me. So instead of being rude back, I again pause, take a breath, and think: this person’s rudeness is not about me. They’re being rude because they’ve decided to be rude.

Maybe they’re having a bad day, maybe they’re just like that, but it doesn’t really matter.

It’s not about me and I don’t have to engage or escalate (unless it’s part of my job). And this will be one tiny part of my day; it doesn’t make or break things unless I decide to dwell on it. So I won’t. 

Traditional Approaches to Mindfulness

The breath is traditionally a key part of mindfulness. When my teacher asked why I thought that was, my response was: “Because it doesn’t matter if you breathed in the past or if you will breathe in the future — you have to breathe right now.” (He laughed so hard he almost fell off his chair, but he said that was basically the reason.) 

Because, as I said, you have to breathe right now, mindful meditation traditionally involves sitting (or standing, or lying down) comfortably and quietly and then focusing on your breath.

Some people focus on the physical sensation of breathing — your chest expanding and contracting, the air flowing in and out your nose. Some people count breaths — either in, one, out one or in, two, three, four. And some people use a meditative phrase.

My teacher was fond of the following, paraphrased from Thich Nhat Hanh: 

Breathing in, I calm my body; breathing out, I smile. 

Breathing in, this is the present moment. 

Breathing out, this is a wonderful moment. 

I feel more peaceful just typing that out. 😊

 

Mindfulness for Busy Minds: Moving Meditation

This part of my beginner’s guide for mindfulness was the most helpful for me when I was a beginner!

When I was starting out, sitting quietly and thinking about nothing was basically impossible. I had waaaay too much going on in my brain for that! Even counting breaths went something like this: 

One… my nose itches… two… are we out of milk?… three… I need to ask Grandma about her pie crust recipe… four… stop, I’m supposed to be concentrating!… five… oh good, it’s working… six… wait, now I’m thinking too hard about thinking! 

If this sounds like you, consider moving meditation. Essentially, instead of focusing on your breathing, you focus entirely on what you’re doing.

For example…

If you’re washing dishes, you’re totally immersed in the water running over your hands, the sound of it hitting the sink, the scrubby texture of your dish sponge, the way the soap smells.

Or if you’re knitting, you’re focused on the feeling of the yarn in your hands, the click-clack sound of the needles, the color and pattern you’re creating.

If you’re out for a walk, you’re thinking about the air on your face, the way your legs move when you step, the wind rustling through the trees, and the smell of greenery around you. You are completely in the present moment. 

Moving meditation gives you a little more sensory input, which can help your busy brain chill out. Instead of sitting still with no input whatsoever, you focus on what’s happening around you. This way your brain has something to latch onto, so it’s easier to keep it from drifting. You’ll still need to nudge your attention back to your task at hand, but I definitely found it easier as a gateway mindfulness practice. 

 

Beginner’s (Resource) Guide to Mindfulness

My teacher was a big fan of Thich Nhat Hanh, a Buddhist monk, activist, and prolific author. His book Peace is Every Step is an excellent beginner’s guide to mindfulness. It’s not too long and very easy to read, but it packs impressive depth into its hundred-odd pages and provides plenty of examples to help your mindfulness practice grow. 

If you’re a person of faith, don’t be put off by mindfulness’s Buddhist roots. There are plenty of books and other resources about mindfulness within the context of faith — just search for “mindfulness + [your faith]” and you’ll get loads of hits. 

There are lots of guided meditation apps out there, too. I haven’t personally tried any, but a lot of people really like them. Give one a whirl and see if you find it useful. (And if you find a really good one, let me know!)

 

The End of the Beginner’s Guide to Mindfulness

This concludes my beginner’s guide to mindfulness! Hopefully now that you’ve made it to the end, you have a better understanding of what mindfulness is, why it’s helpful, and how to practice it in your life. If you have any questions about anything I’ve said, drop me a comment or email! I’ll do my best to answer them.

Now that you’re more familiar with mindfulness, how do you plan to incorporate it into your life?

Pin for later: